Therapist changed her boundaries in November, while I was inpatient. I don’t even know if it is a big deal or not, objectively.
No more outside session contact, at all.
Just the day after I told her how helpful and necessary it was for me. She says it does not change that she is there for me. I don’t believe her a single bit. It felt like such a massive abandonment. It felt like she had realized I am not a person and am bad, and connection should be forbidden. It meant so many things for me.
On some level, I died on that day.
I am still here, but I am dead. It does not really get easier.
I wish I could have died.
In the forests of the night 
I’m so sorry. I’m so pleased to hear from you, though x
Thank you 🙂 I am glad that you are still here.
I don’t post anymore really but I am still here, reading along x
I am sorry, for some reason, I did not get any notification that you had replied, I will be more watchful now.
)
I had noticed you had not posted in a long time and was wondering how you had been doing, and if your words had… disappeared like mine (and I lost the password to your old posts 😦 ) Your blog has definitely been one that always resonated with me so much (sometimes a bit too much to be able to read it
I haven’t got much to write about at the moment! My little girl is nearly a year old, I’m on a big therapy break from T (probably ending rather than restarting but not sure yet). I think lots and lots of people have lost their words over the last year or so, it’s been a crazy world. x